Pray Network Forum

We all go through painful experiences of one kind or another, and how we handle life’s adversities will have a lot to do in determining our character and our destiny. The intriguing story of Jabez reveals how our pain can be transformed as we lay hold of God’s promises:

Jabez was more honorable than his brothers; and his mother called his name Jabez, saying, “Because I bore him in pain.” Jabez called upon the God of Israel, saying, “Oh that you would bless me and enlarge my border, and that your hand might be with me, and that you would keep me from harm so that it might not bring me pain!” And God granted what he asked (1 Chronicles 4:9-10 ESV).

Too often, people assume that their upbringing inevitably determines their destiny. But Jabez knew otherwise. Right from the beginning, we see that he stood out from the crowd, and he was “more honorable” even than his own brothers.

However, as we read about Jabez’ life, we realize his life got off to a rough start. It seemed like the cards were stacked against him. His birth was so painful that “his mother called his name Jabez”—derived from the Hebrew word for pain.

Perhaps you can relate to Jabez’ story at this point. Your parents probably didn’t name you “a Pain”—at least not formally! But let’s be honest: Sometimes parents, siblings, peers, pastors, or employers send us negative messages about our identity…who we are. Or maybe there was a bully in your neighborhood who said you were too skinny…too fat…too ugly…too short…or too stupid.

There’s an old saying that is totally false. I’m sure you’ve heard it: “Sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can never hurt me.” That truth is just the opposite: We can recover from sticks and stones and even broken bones—but people’s words often cause us a lifetime of hurt.

That’s how Jabez’ story begins: with pain…with rejection from the very people who should have shown him the most love and acceptance. But the good news is that Jabez wasn’t content to wallow in his situation. He rejected the labels put on him by his detractors, choosing instead to seek God for a new identity…a new purpose…and a new destiny.

How did your story begin in its early chapters? Perhaps you had a wonderful, loving family that cared for you and nurtured you all along the way. But I meet so many people today who have had an experience more like Jabez.

So what did Jabez do to break free from the negative labels that threatened to bind him to a life of failure or mediocrity? The text says, “Jabez called upon the God of Israel.” If you are going to break free from people’s opinions about you, you must cry out for HIGHER opinion—the opinion of Almighty God. In the end, it’s really just HIS opinion that maters, isn’t it? When you stand before Him in eternity, the bullies and naysayers won’t be there to tear you down. The only thing that will matter will be hear His beautiful words of affirmation, “Well done, good and faithful servant” (Matthew 25:21).

We’re specifically told that he called upon “the God of Israel.” This doesn’t just mean he was calling upon the God of the nation of Israel. No, Jabez was calling upon the God of JACOB—the patriarch whose name was changed by God to ISRAEL.

Do you see why this is significant? Jacob had a pretty dysfunctional childhood, and his own brother seemed intent on killing him. And just like Jabez, Jacob had been given a rather negative name—Jacob, the “supplanter” or “usurper.” And up until the point when Jacob’s name was changed, he had lived up to his negative name, becoming an opportunistic scoundrel and deceiver.

But after Jacob wrestled all night with God in Genesis 32:22-29, the Lord changed his name to Israel, which meant “Triumphant with God” or “Prince with God.”

You see, Jabez knew the story of Jacob well. He saw how God had transformed Jacob from being a PAIN to being a PRINCE. And Jabez called on the “God of Israel (Jacob)” to do the same for him.

Perhaps you need a name change today…a new identity. God can take your PAIN and make you a PRINCE or PRINCESS. He can take your FAILURES and give you a glorious FUTURE. But you have a role to play. You must cry out to Him, like Jabez did. You may even need to wrestle with Him, as Jacob did. But don’t let go until you have a new name…a fresh start…a new beginning.

And I want you to notice that Jabez asked God to give him several specific things. This is an important lesson for us, because sometimes our prayers and our plans are too vague and undefined. I encourage you today to be specific about what you are asking God for. Specific prayer requests will bring specific answers!

Jabez first requested of the Lord, “Oh that you would bless me.” God wants to bless YOU, my friend! So go ahead, like Jabez, and ASK Him to bless you.

The second thing Jabez asked is that God would “enlarge his border.” In the same way, God wants to enlarge you today. He wants to give you bigger dreams…higher vision…more audacious plans.

But think of how incredible this prayer request must have been for Jabez, the man who was labeled a pain and a loser. He could have curled up in a ball and wallowed in his victimhood, but instead he did just the opposite. He called on God to enlarge his territory and give him greater responsibilities and impact.

So what about YOU? Is there some area of your life that you need God to enlarge? Your career…your finances…your health…your relationships…your ministry…your vision? Today can be your first step in asking God for an INCREASE that will change your entire trajectory in life.

Jabez’ next request was that “God’s hand” would be upon his life. This expressed Jabez’ recognition that he needed GOD’S FAVOR in order to accomplish his life’s PURPOSE. This is so important for you to see: In order to escape from any painful experiences that would hold you back from your destiny, you need God’s favor.

Jabez’ final request was that God would keep from harm—from the things that would cause pain, either to himself or the people around him. Jabez was a man of great faith, but he also was a realist. He understood that he had received a legacy of pain and dysfunction, and the natural thing would be to continue that legacy in his own life. It’s no secret that people in pain tend to cause pain to others. People who have been abused often become abusers. Children of alcoholics and addicts too often follow in their parents footsteps.

But Jabez knew the negative patterns must STOP! He had been called a pain, but that’s not how he wanted to treat others.

This passage about Jabez ends with a beautiful conclusion: “And God granted what he asked.” I love happy endings, don’t you? Just as God did in the life of Jabez, He has planned a happy ending for YOU!

Recently my wife and I started watching the Fringe TV series on Netflix. The fictional show deals with unexplained supernatural and technological occurrences investigated by the FBI’s “fringe science” division. It turns out that many of the grisly events have been caused by a collision of parallel universes and alternate timelines.

      Having watched several seasons of Fringe, I can’t help but think of a pivotal but rarely discussed passage in Job 26:14: “Behold, these are the fringes of His ways; and how faint a word we hear of Him!”

      After years of feeling the smug satisfaction of knowing he was an exceptionally upright and virtuous man, Job finally understood an awful truth: Although he had been doing all the right “religious” things, he was only on the outer edges of God’s plan for his life. Instead of having an intimate daily relationship with the Lord, he was only hearing God’s voice faintly and sporadically.

      During the climactic final scene of Job’s story, he admits to the Lord, “I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear; but now my eye sees You; therefore I retract, and I repent in dust and ashes” (Job 42:5-6).

      People always wonder why Job had to go through such horrendous trials. Part of the answer is simply this: God wouldn’t allow Job to remain on the fringes.

      The Lord wanted to bless Job in new ways, beyond his wildest dreams. Yet none of that was possible if Job was content to stay on the fringes. He already had been blessed with great wealth, but God had a far greater dimension of abundance in mind for Job.

      There have been many times in my Christian life when I languished on the fringes of God’s ways. Perhaps you have too. Often when we’re on the fringes, we don’t even know it.

      Until the heat was on, Job didn’t have a clue about his true condition or what he was missing. He had fallen into the common trap of comparing himself to those around him, instead of comparing himself to God’s holiness. He was content to be “the greatest of all the people of the East” instead of great in God’s kingdom (Job 1:1-3).

      Just as in the Fringe series, Job’s ordeal stemmed from a collision of universes or kingdoms. God versus Satan. Good versus evil. Relationship versus religion. The judgmental assumptions of his friends versus God’s ultimate plan to bless him.

      But amid this horrific collision, God was working all things together for Job’s good (Romans 8:28). If it hadn’t been for his trials, Job might have never discovered he was living on the fringe.

      However, there’s a major difference between Fringe and the Bible. In the TV series, exciting “paranormal” events happen on the “fringe” of human experience. In contrast, when believers are content to stay on the fringe in their relationship with God, the exact opposite is true—life is boring and there’s little, if any, experience of the supernatural. A life on the fringe is a bland, powerless, and unfulfilling existence.

      Aren’t you tired of living on the fringes of God’s purposes? I am.

      It’s time to dive in and go deeper in your relationship with the Lord. Yes, you may experience turbulent and disturbing collisions between parallel kingdoms at times, but that’s where the fun is. It’s in the center of God’s will that you will find peace, satisfaction, and fruitfulness.

Sometimes we’re on the brink of our breakthrough, but something is holding us back. Can you relate?

After Moses’ death, Joshua found himself on the banks of the Jordan River, overlooking the Promised Land on the other side. God was telling him to take the Israelites over the river and into their destiny—but there was a problem.

Forty years earlier, Joshua had been one of the 12 spies sent to view the Promised Land before the Israelites entered (Numbers 13 – 14). The spies all gave a glowing report about what a wonderful land it was, but 10 of the spies said there were fierce enemies and “giants” in the land. It was much too dangerous to risk entry, they warned.

Joshua and Caleb were the only spies who said the Israelites should obey God and trust Him to give them the land. But their report was rejected, and more than a million people chose to wander in the wilderness rather than enter the Promised Land.

Now Joshua had come full circle, right back to this place where he had boldly proclaimed God’s provision—but where he suffered an agonizing and humiliating defeat when his message was rejected. Forty years had passed, but he still was traumatized by the memories.

Perhaps you find yourself in a similar place. You are on the brink of the Promised Land. You have tasted its fruit before, and you know it’s an incredibly good land. Yet you also remember the painful experiences associated with this. Fear and apprehension rise up within you when you consider the prospect of taking a step of faith to cross over and face the giants.

God has brought you to this place, not so He can torment you, but so He can heal you. He is telling you, just as He told Joshua,   (Joshua 1:9).

You’ve the Promised Land before, and here you are again—right on the brink. The Lord has brought you full circle so you can face your fears and find your destiny.

You are SO close, and you can succeed this time. Don’t let anything, or anyone, hold you back. I’m convinced the call toward your future is stronger than the tormenting chains of your past.

• Realize that God is going to break through for you - You can’t do it by yourself. He has the resurrection power to break through every obstacle in your life. Meditate on God and His Word until you know that He is the breakthrough God for you.
• Yield all control to God - Let go of the known and trust God to get you across to the other side. So often we try to control our own lives. We must let go of anything that God may want us to give up. We need to yield our will, and move to a new level of trust in God.
• Wait on God and find out what action He wants you to take -Be still and make sure you know God’s leading in your life. Some of you may be in a place of waiting, and it may take faith to wait. But others of you may know what God wants you to do, but you have been hesitant and fearful. Hesitate no longer.
• Move forward in faith and obedience - Bold action will open the gate and release God’s spiritual power. Do not waver because of fear. Take a leap of faith. God will catch you in His arms on the other side.