Phil Miglioratti Interviewed Ian Harber,
Author of “Walking Through Deconstruction” ~
"Confronting the Deconstruction Crisis in the Evangelical Church"
"Raised in the church, I was always in trouble.
But I wasn't in trouble because of my behavior.
It was my questions that always found me trouble."
PHIL >>> Ian, why are so many Christians judged as losing their faith simply because they have questions about the Bible or a theological teaching?
IAN >>> I think there’s this idea that if you aren’t completely certain about your beliefs then you’re lacking faith. When you divorce faith from reason, people just expect you to believe. So when you have trouble “just” believing and want to wrestle with it and try to understand it, some people perceive that as you losing your faith. In reality loving God with your mind isn’t losing your faith, it’s an exercise in faith. It’s part of obeying the greatest commandment and living into your full humanity.
Of course, our faith is built on things that we cannot always see, facts we cannot always prove, and mysteries that aren’t always revealed. There will always need to be some acceptance of that. Reason has its limits. But faith and reason are not opposites. They are dance partners.
"I left my faith, as I knew it, behind"
PHIL >>> In my spiritual journey, questioning and doubting are not synonymous. Doubting for me would have been an unraveling of faith on a path to rejection. Questioning for me has been a serious and very spiritual attempt to clarify or re-search a specific translation, interpretation or recalibrate an application of scripture I have accepted or adopted. For me, "crisis of faith" is not about leaving God but more a "crisis of what I was taught to believe." How does this fit with your view of "deconstruction?"
IAN >>> It depends a lot on the environment you’re questioning in. Some people were raised in a non-anxious environment where questioning was integrated with faith. People weren’t scared of questions and so questioning was just seen as part of the life of faith.
But a lot of people were not raised in that kind of environment. They were told that to have questions was tantamount to losing your faith. That produces a level of anxiety that, in a lot of ways, turns into a self-fulfilling prophecy. That’s how a “crisis of what I was taught to believe” turns into a “crisis of faith.” I think one of the potential benefits of deconstruction is that there is the opportunity for questions to become integrated into your faith in the way that we’re both talking about here. You’re no longer really rattled by questions but see them as a way of building your faith. But when you’re told time and time again that questions are bad and you shouldn’t have them, any question you have gets elevated to existential stakes real fast.
Walking Through Deconstruction: How to Be a Companion in a Crisis of Faith
by Ian Harber * * Foreword by Gavin Ortlund
"Some will point out that what we need to help people in their deconstruction is more apologetics.
The truth is we can't control someone's deconstruction."
PHIL >>> This is an important insight and I agree completely with you. Most evangelical Christians believe deconstruction is always and best solved by information and persuasion that can come perilously close to unhealthy control. What does the title of your book tell us about the approach you recommend we take?
IAN >>> My book isn’t called “Stop Deconstructing.” It’s called “Walking Through Deconstruction.” The only way out is through. In fact, my problem with much of the exvangelical space is that they really haven’t deconstructed enough. They’ve deconstructed their Mainstream American Evangelical assumptions… and pretty much nothing else. They still haven’t touched their Mainstream Progressive Post-Enlightenment Post-Sexual Revolution Assumptions. But I digress.
People, by and large, are not swayed by logical arguments. They play a part (we don’t often change our beliefs if we think they’re irrational), but that’s not the whole of it. We also form our beliefs in light of our community and our experiences. That’s why the subtitle is “How To Be A Companion In A Crisis of Faith.” I don’t think people need Judges In A Crisis Of Faith. They need Companions. Who are strong in their faith, aren’t swayed by false teaching, aren’t scared of hard questions and conversations, and who can take the long view to walk with someone for as long as it takes.
"Deconstruction is a crisis of faith that leads to the
questioning of core doctrines and
untangling of cultural ideologies that settles
in a faith that is different than before."
PHIL >>> What do we need to know/remember when we personally go into or share another's "Crisis of Faith" experience?
IAN >>> No deconstruction is exactly the same. Just because there are similar contours does not mean they’re identical. That’s why I wrote that definition the way I did. It covers a broad spectrum and it’s more like pieces to a puzzle than it is a rigid, exacting box that someone can’t move in. Some people’s might be more doctrinal, other’s might be more cultural, some will be both.
The most important part, though, is the crisis. This is not a mere intellectual exercise. This is existentially frightening. Remembering that people are walking through this scared, with no idea how it will end and what that will mean for their life, is the most important thing for you to keep in mind.
PHIL >>> Divine inspiration of Holy Scripture does not transfer to our systematic theologies or doctrinal statements. How can church leaders and teachers initiate a Spirit-led "Questioning of Core Doctrines" that brings more accurate clarification (and if necessary, correction) to our beliefs?
IAN >>> First-hand knowledge of the Bible is crucial. Some people have this and some don’t. The ones that don’t need to be exposed to Scripture In The Raw. The ones that do might have trouble interpreting many of the more difficult passages (and who doesn’t?).
The Church is fallible. The Church has gotten things wrong. But also, the Church has wrestled with all of the same things we wrestle with today. Reading Scripture in light of the Great Tradition in the Church is invaluable. Realizing that God does not do things randomly. There are reasons for the things he says and does and commands and those reasons are actually for our good, both materially and existentially. Therapeutically. A physical resurrection means death is actually defeated. Don’t hold back the good news that is contained in the core doctrines of our faith.
PHIL >>> "Untangling of Cultural Ideologies" requires the courage to recognize where we have allowed our worldview presuppositions and cultural trends and traditions to infiltrate (and sometimes infect) our beliefs. How can pastors and church leaders disciple their members to see that this type of questioning or re-examination is not only safe (when Spirit-led) but also necessary since we "see through a glass darkly" 1 Corinthians 13:12)?
IAN >>> Christians have always found a way to tie themsleves up with the powers of the world. Every time we give more to Caesar (whatever he is due) than to God (everything), we compromise our witness. We should always be Christians first and everything else second.
One way to disciple people into this is of course to call out the idols of the world that lure our affections. But the other way is to go into the storehouse and bring out treasures new and old, as Jesus said, and show people the beauty and wonder of living life before the face of God. There’s a place for both. But too often I think we settle for a negative vision instead of a positive vision..
PHIL >>> "Settling in a Faith that is Different than Before" ... How do we help those who are authentically searching to "develop a thriving faith in the process" of reconstructing their spiritual worldview and biblical doctrines?
IAN >>> The first is simply to love them. Pray for them. Don’t judge them. Help them feel normal. Show them all the saints that have gone through this before them. If Augustine can deconstruct, they can too.
The second thing is to show them mere Christianity. I don’t just mean Lewis’ book (though of course that’s a great place to start) but show them what Christians have always believed. Take them down to the core. The Apostle’s Creed. The Nicene Creed. Get into the nitty gritty and show them what the Church has wrestled with over the millennia. Get them out of our modern evangelical bubble and introduce them to Augustine, Boethius, Thomas A Kempis, Henry Scougal, and Chesterton. Read the Didache with them. Read the Bible with them and make no question off-limit. This isn’t a formula. There is no formula. I hope you see what I’m getting at here.
There’s this modern evangelical bubble that makes someone feel like this is all there is to Christianity. There’s not. The historic, orthodox Christian faith is bigger than whatever has happened between, oh I don’t know, the years 1979-2025. Help them see the forest from the trees, to get out of their little pond and into the ocean. Maybe they’ll see the ocean and realize they liked their little pond after all. Maybe they’ll settle into another pond down the stream. Not all ponds are equally valid. Why? Which ones are? I think seeing just how rich the treasure is in Christ shows them the beauty of Christ himself.
"What we can do is create environments (of) healthy relationships and
churches full of trust and care (that have) a more robust knowledge of our faith to talk through with others?"
PHIL >>> Please give us a 1-sentence question that sparks our thoughts on how to ... {taken from the Table of contents}
IAN >>>
- Reconstruct Relationships >>> Do I trust God with this person more than I trust myself?
- Reconstruct Belief >>> Is the core of my faith strong enough to withstand all questions?
- Reconstruct Suffering >>> Do I glory in my sufferings or do I rage against them?
- Reconstruct Discipleship >>> What do I believe the Christian life actually is?
- Reconstruct Church >>> Is my church trying to form people into the image of Christ or are we just performing for each other?
- Reconstruct God >>> Who is God really?
"Many of us don't take deconstruction seriously enough.
We don't understand the depths of the problems fueling it"
Gavin Ortland; Forward
PHIL >>> A final comment - insight - scripture - question we can take with us ...
IAN >>> Many of us were sold a sort of paint-by-numbers Christianity. This idea that faith was supposed to be certain, our lives would up-and-to-the-right if we just had enough faith, and everyone has to agree on everything or your salvation is up for question. Don’t deviate. Don’t question. Don’t actually love God with your mind. Just believe these things, do these things, set it, and forget it.
That’s not at all what the Christian life is like and it never has been. As Henry Scougal wrote,
“Some consider it to be primarily a matter of intellect and understanding and orthodox opinions… Others consider it to be a matter of outward behavior… Still others focus on their emotions… [But] true religion is a union with the soul of God. It is participation in the divine nature. It is the very image of God drawn upon the soul. In the apostle’s words, it is Christ formed in us.”
Let’s not settle for anything less than that.
PHIL >>> Ian, please write a prayer for the reader who wants to be a "companion in a crisis of faith" for others and for the Church ...
IAN >>> Father, thank you for your patience with us. You’re not scared of our questions or doubts. You’re not bound by this cultural expression or that. You’re all together good, and compassionate, and slow to anger, and abounding in faithful love. Help us to be patient with others in their doubts. Help us to see beyond our cultural expression. Help us to be good, compassionate, slow to anger, and abounding in faithful love to those you have entrusted to our care. Show us the brilliant light of Christ and let us reflect it to those who now walk in darkness. For the people walking in darkness have seen a great light. Let us live in your light all the days of our life. Amen.
NEXT>>>
- The New "Normal"
- Deconstructing or Reconstructing Faith?
- Discipleship Flowing from a Christian Worldview
- #ReimagineSCRIPTURE...Always take it seriously, but don't always take it literally
- Keep scrolling ... new content/commentary has been added, including:
- Playing Jenga With Epistemology: The Fragile Architecture of Knowing in the Age of Competing Realities
>>>KEEP SCROLLING for RELATED CONTENT & COMMENTARY, RESOURCES & REPLIES
Defining Deconstruction
—Adapted from chapter one, “Defining Deconstruction”
“I’m deconstructing my faith.”
Perhaps someone has said this to you recently. A friend, child, spouse, parent, coworker, or congregant. You don’t really know what they mean, but it doesn’t sound good. Just from the name, you can tell they are taking something apart. If it’s their faith they’re deconstructing, then they must be taking their faith apart. But why?
As you start asking questions, you quickly realize you’ve gotten yourself in over your head. They might start asking questions about the Bible, God, or the church that you’ve never thought about before. Or maybe you have thought about them, but they felt so big that you simply pushed them out of your mind and forgot about them. Maybe it’s something you haven’t thought about since seminary (if you went). They might start talking about large cultural and political issues that seem like they came out of nowhere. They begin accusing the church of doing this or not doing that. “Where is this coming from?” you wonder.
The questions and the accusations that you hear from them put you on edge. You start to feel anxiety well up inside of you. You think of the other popular deconstruction stories that you’ve heard of—Michael Gungor, Joshua Harris, Audrey Assad, and more, none of whom are Christians anymore. Your mind starts racing a hundred miles per hour. “Are they losing their faith?” “I thought they loved Jesus!” “I wonder if they’re in some kind of sin.” “I’m overwhelmed by all of these questions.” And it all comes down to this one word to describe it: deconstruction.
The word deconstruction goes back to the philosopher Jacques Derrida, who used it in a technical way to describe the process of “critically reevaluat[ing] the fundamental arrangement and operations of any and all forms of analysis.” If that sounds confusing, that’s because it is. Deconstruction, by its nature, is difficult to describe because it’s a process that deconstructs the very words needed to describe it. But it’s insufficient to say that deconstruction is simply a process of analysis or critique.
Here’s the primary difference: in other forms of analysis or critique, there is typically a method that is followed in order to reach a predetermined outcome. Think of the scientific method. After observing a phenomenon, you ask questions about it and research existing answers or solutions. If you don’t find any satisfactory answers, you pose a hypothesis, perform a set of experiments to test your hypothesis, and draw conclusions from your experiments about whether your hypothesis has been proven right or wrong.
Deconstruction isn’t like this. There is no set process and no predetermined conclusion to deconstruction. It’s not a process you decide to undertake to investigate a problem. It’s something you encounter and enter into. The only thing you can do in deconstruction is allow the process to unfold and follow it where it goes.
People don’t wake up one day with the conscious thought, “I want to be closer to the Lord. I guess I should deconstruct my faith! What’s the healthiest way for me to do that?”
The person who is deconstructing did not choose to deconstruct. You, the person walking with them, cannot control their process of deconstruction. Deconstruction is an experience that happens to you. You don’t make a rational decision to deconstruct your faith. You realize you’re deconstructing after it has already begun. This, as you might imagine, is a terrifying realization. The reason people who are deconstructing bristle at the idea of “good versus bad” deconstruction is that it feels as though people are trying to control them in a process that cannot be controlled.
You might be starting to understand why deconstruction can be such a difficult topic to discuss. It’s difficult to know exactly what we’re talking about when we talk about deconstruction. We need a working definition that captures the basic ideas of the process while being flexible enough to account for the various ways people experience deconstruction in their individual stories.
Here is how I define deconstruction: “Deconstruction is a crisis of faith that leads to the questioning of core doctrines and untangling of cultural ideologies that settles in a faith that is different from before.” You can divide the definition into four parts: 1. A crisis of faith 2. Questioning of core doctrines 3. Untangling of cultural ideologies 4. Settling in a faith that is different from before
Each of the four parts of the definition are crucial to understanding what deconstruction is, but the most important part about this definition is that deconstruction is, before anything else, a crisis of faith. We can talk about doctrine, culture, and reconstruction all we want. Still, if we do not acknowledge that deconstruction is, first and foremost, a crisis of faith, then we have not understood deconstruction.
Excellent interview, Phil & Ian. And challenging insights. Thank you.
If our knowledge is both limited and our processor is (sin) tainted, then humanly speaking, there MUST BE (apparent) PARADOXES. So pick your fav paradoxes. Faith v Reason. Sovereignty v Responsibility. Science v Ex Nihilo Creation. and so on. One's hermeneutic as we read the scriptures becomes helpfully important. As for me, I'll lean into what God has made most clear, study the other items but at the end of the day, confess as the disciples did: "Where else would we go, Lord? You have the words of life."
Honestly, I feel my deconstruction journey wasn't a crisis of faith, but a prayer of "Lord, show me where I'm being deceived" since He warns us 30+x in the NT alone "do not be deceived", so I thought I would ask Him!
it was/still is a very painful, powerful & profound journey as He answered that prayer in MANY WAYS! My faith has grown incredibly as I went back to scripture (incl the Gr & Hebrew) like the Bereans to find HIS TRUTH, but I also grieve at how our traditions (& translations to some extent) of man/elders are literally harming the priesthood of all believers via poor/wrong theology & doctrines that are being perpetuated!
From a Featured Contributor - -
The Difference Between Deconstruction and Deconversion
The first is a starting point toward the second.
The term “deconstruction” is, sadly, very popular in main line Christian churches and on social media. Like so many words in the English language, each of us tends to define it differently. For some, it means leaving the Christian faith entirely (details here). For others, it means maintaining certain Christian beliefs while rejecting others. Finally, it can be a roadmap to strengthening one’s faith or destroying it (details here).
Webster defines Deconstruction as, “the analytic examination of something (such as a theory), often in order to reveal its inadequacy.”
Wikipedia defines Faith Deconstruction as, “a process during which religious believers reexamine and question their beliefs.”
The problem with deconstruction is not the questioning or reexamination of our beliefs to bring more insight and clarity to our faith… it is that often the motivation for its initiation is counter to the Lord’s desire for sanctification. Often those that begin to travel on this path never find themselves reconstructing their faith in a way that is salvific (saving). They deny the unity of the Bible as the source for God’s commands, preferring instead to focus on “loving one’s neighbor” and rejecting those aspects of core theology that do not meet their human, preconceived notions of right and wrong.
Once one rejects God’s autonomous ability to be our righteous judge, by definition they reject the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross as Lord of our lives. All believers must express a willingness to not only accept Christ as Savior, but also as Lord; as presented in the Bible, a divine work of God intended as an instruction manual for the Christian life. This terminal form of deconstruction, without a saving reconstruction, becomes Deconversion.
“Deconversion means giving up Christianity in exchange for a different religion, spiritualism, or no religion, such as atheism or agnosticism. Those who deconvert from Christianity reject core tenets of orthodox Christian faith, typically distance themselves from Christian community, and often, though not always, reject religion altogether” (details here).
Of course this brings up the question of perseverance of the Saints. Said more clearly, are those who deconstruct all the way to deconversion, never saved in the first place or have they really lost their salvation in the process? This is a timeless argument for theologians to grapple with.
Playing Jenga With Epistemology
The Fragile Architecture of Knowing in the Age of Competing Realities
I’m no specialist. What I am is a 69-year-old polymath artist, a citizen who is intellectually curious and concerned for people and planet. I’m a student, writing to process and understand—even if my understanding is partial or contingent. This is a subject that keeps me up at night. Lose what is real and trustworthy and you can lose a civilization. It’s no joke.
The Context: We’ve played Jenga with how we know what we know and believe. The game has collapsed; it’s over. We’re all losers for it. Language and knowledge have been deconstructed ad infinitum. Which, in turn, has demolished the function and effectiveness of argument and persuasion. When persuasion dies, power fills the vacuum. The history of humanity has a very predictable pattern. Once convincing communication limps off into the shadows, coercion arrives, then control.
Free speech doesn’t matter much if words and basic concepts have no shared meaning.
A round-earth believer and a flat-earth believer cannot go into the maritime shipping business together.
While we are busy addressing all the pressing problems of life on the planet, we better focus on fixing (healing) the epistemology problem ASAP. If we don’t, we won’t have any words or meaning in common to fix any other problems.
Some readers may think this wordy, nerdy artist doth protest too much, but what’s lost when shared meaning and persuasion collapse does not disappear. It mutates into living competing realities, each claiming cosmic purpose within a single divided nation.
COMPETING REALITIES
There have been plenty of prophetic and predictive hints that this day was coming. We didn’t listen; we refused to look at the evidence. It was all there in the work of Peter Berger, Neil Postman, Jacques Derrida, Hanna Arendt, and Richard Rorty. Even as far back as Émile Durkheim (1858–1917). Recent warnings are everywhere, including Bruno Latour, and Shoshana Zuboff. This summary of recent analysis rings true, right?
Warning: Social media platforms manufacture personalized realities optimized for scrolling and engagement, not truth and trust—turning epistemic fragmentation into addiction and profit. Call it: surveillance capitalism (Zuboff).
Now that the good goals of comprehension, communication, collaboration, and compromise are paused, we neither see nor hear each other—except as competing realities.
I feel this competing reality thing very strongly. Especially so, with Trump as the American president and his inner circle, the billionaire boys club of artificial intelligence (AI), and Christian Nationalists.
I admit it. I do see these three as competing realities. Not as intellectual socio-political policy disagreements. Not as a free-will choice of opting into AI or not. And, especially not the old adage from the Christian community as a solution: In essentials unity, in non-essentials liberty, and in all things charity.
All I can say, all I can pray, is God, family, community, help me! I don’t want to be a competing reality. I don’t want to choose a side (or sides).
I want Christ as my steady gig1. I want to love you, my neighbor, and to embody what my discipleship to Jesus calls the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.
This is the side I’ve been on since 1982. I’m staying put. Just getting started—got a lot to learn.
THE E WORD
At the heart of this post is epistemology (the inquiry into how knowledge is formed, trusted, and used). No surprise there. It underpins pretty much everything I’m interested in, including trust or Truth with a capital T.
We really have a trust + truth problem, don’t we?
I don’t know how to say it, so I’ll just blurt it out: America is in the depression stage of epistemic collapse—the heavy realization and grief that there is no going back.
The disordering of shared trust + truth (or facts) is not a temporary disruption. It is our cultural condition and will likely remain so for years to come. Important: Epistemic collapse doesn’t eliminate our frameworks of knowledge. It crushes their credibility, coherence, and shared meaning (which is their functionality and what really hits us in our daily lives).
THE TRI-MODAL DECONSTRUCTOR
I don’t know if Donald J. Trump (citizen and president) is most responsible for this epistemic collapse (without letting anyone on the socio-political spectrum off the hook—including myself). But he’s earned the title of The Deconstructor by consistently affecting his own unique tri-modal language. A way of using speech and manipulating meaning that bypasses literacy, decency, and comprehension altogether. Instead, it appeals to power and dominance—where making sense or persuasion are relics from a bygone civic era .
1. The Language of Falsehood
Trump transformed lying from moral failure into a political and social strategy. Falsehood became performative (it’s not old-school political rhetoric). For Trump, lying without consequence is proof of dominance, not deceit. Facts no longer correct error (sorry fact-checkers), because the meaning of lying has been reimagined as congruent with, and supportive of, a personally constructed reality rather than fidelity to truth. As a result, persuasion lost its power. How? It is impossible to correct a lie without the referent of truth. As far as I’ve been able to discern, there is no reality referent guiding Trump other than what he constructs on a minute-by-minute basis. This, I argue, is why no one has successfully leveled a critique against Trump that has had any long-term political or social efficacy.
2. The Language of Deconstruction
Trump instinctively (not intellectually) weaponized post-truth theories seeded by academic deconstruction and popular relativism. His meaning became a surprising mix of nonsense, sign, and signal—where tweets, slogans, and single words function as emotional triggers and affinity identifiers. Trump normalized: 1) the previously unthinkable idea that words could completely lose their general referential reliability, and 2) that apart from the use of a teleprompter, an American president could speak extemporaneously and consistently fail to make sense (and it not matter to his audience, or the press, eventually).
3. The Language of Domination
Through sexist, racist, and predatory bullying, Trump fused the language of humiliation with entertainment, normalizing cruelty into communal sport. His coarseness became theater for the aggrieved and then license to act. First, Trump modeled how to do it in public; then he granted them borrowed power to mimic. Eventually his followers went beyond words into violence. The result: social behavioral norms eroded, and might was confirmed as right. Even those who professed to be followers of Jesus bought in, setting aside the inarguable core teachings of Christ, insinuating that empathetic, neighbor love was woke and weak (a sure sign of a competing reality since Jesus called love of God and neighbor the summary of the law—sole direction for life).
DISORDER + DYSREGULATION
Epistemic collapse is when people no longer share a common understanding of facts, evidence, or reliable sources of knowledge. It’s a societal breakdown in how we agree on what is accurate or trustworthy. It’s the process of how we know what we know, cast into a state of disorder and dysregulation, resulting in many competing perceived realities. I imagine every reader has felt this phenomenon viscerally.
When we believe our reality is reliable and our neighbor’s is not, we’re likely to end up at epistemic closure (which I confess is not where I want to be). This is where the door of communication shuts, and competing realities can no longer engage in dialogue (unless the individuals involved are inquisitive, respectful, empathetic, and willing to keep knocking and talking).
I use the words disorder and dysregulation because:
1. The regular checks and balances regarding how our beliefs are formed, tested, communicated, and revised are disrupted and failing.
2. Instead of an ordered system of epistemic regulation (where knowledge is pursued, tested, and refined), we now face erratic, unpredictable, and disordered patterns (in ourselves and all around us). You’ll recognize them: beliefs shift suddenly, evidence is ignored or distorted, trust in knowledge sources fluctuates wildly among identity/affinity groups, and even the simplest negotiations of daily life demand navigating competing realities (including within families and friendships we cherish).
3. Reason, evidence, dialectic (reasoning through disagreement), and verification—what I’d call the traditional regulatory organs of knowledge—have lost so much of their capacity to moderate learning and communication.
4. Finally, the once life-giving process of knowing isn’t the self-stabilizing work and play it used to be. The vast amount of contradictory information now available destabilizes us. Daily acts of knowledge-seeking (that once felt steady and generative) can just as easily feel chaotic and out of control. Of course, it’s not only language. Its image too, isn’t it? Can anything be trusted?
Which leads to a few, brief words about deception. Deception is not new. What is new is the scale, speed, automation, and subtlety of it. Social media and AI are accelerating the reach of deception. This is not the post to deep dive into the deceptions of AI or of Christian Nationalism. We can pause for a breath, though, and admit together just how exhausting it is to navigate a world that’s trying to deceive us at every turn—for their profit and empire-building.
I know one thing: you cannot tackle complex problems of epistemology and trust without language and meaning we all trust (even partially so). There will always be some theorist, self-help business guru, or politician who will attempt to convince citizens that complex problems can be solved simply through the repetition of one word or phrase, such as “hoax” or “witch hunt.” Not true.
TAKING BACK CONTROL OF THE NARRATIVE
We need our language, meaning, truth, and trust. Let’s stop allowing people who worship power to hijack and co-opt these for something other than what will serve us, our families, communities, nation, and world. Let’s hang on to literacy, functional shared meaning, and the ability to see and hear each other. To speak, to use words as bridges to collaboration not barricades—even when we don’t agree on everything.
Our disagreements must be navigated within the same shared reality, though. I repeat: A round-earth believer and a flat-earth believer cannot go into the maritime shipping business together.
This explains in part why it has been impossible for me to find any shared meaning with Christian nationalists. Jesus is common ground only if your definition of Creator With Us, his mission, and invitation to the human family is in common—is coherent and congruent. Without this foundation, I don’t know how to call what we believe the same, because it isn’t.
It will take an open-hearted, cross-generational rebuild of how we know what we know to collapse the competing realities fighting for our hearts, minds, and data. I want to believe we can find shared language and meaning again—and speak persuasively about everything that matters to life on this planet. (Insert previous prayer.)
All it really takes to begin is two people willing to listen and talk freely, pausing as needed to clarify the meaning of words. “Now, when you say ____, what do you mean, exactly? I’m listening.”
I would love to write more about how transformational life as a student of Jesus, the Word made flesh, has been. I’m so cautious, though. Not for any reason other than the number of “squeaky wheel” competing realities named Christian (including the people in Trump’s inner circle and their Christian affiliations).
These set up a contrast which must be addressed. Written language is effective, but comparing and contrasting theologies and practices gets complex very quickly. Thankfully, there’s no substitute for human relationship and the Spirit of God—for saying, “Follow me as I follow Christ, and we will talk along the way.” This invitation is always available to anyone who wants to take a proverbial walk with me and have a conversation.
TRUST IS GRAVITY
When all the noise and illusions fall away —like status, fame, ideology, wealth, empire-building, and the shiny distractions of life (all that you can’t take with you) —what we want most is to belong and to matter. To be seen, known, and loved for who we truly are—to know mercy and justice, and for many, to walk quietly and humbly with God. This is the “all that you can’t leave behind.” Only organic, analog, fleshy human relationships can set the stage for this good to happen.
Behind our drive for success, control, and safety is the longing to be received without condition. To have someone say to you, I love you, accept you, and do not reject you. And then stay and not leave the room. To stay with you through bad hair days, job loss, food insecurity, racial discrimination, losing insurance, divorce, misplaced anger, and your basement flooding. To feed you homemade soup after a medical treatment. To have long, circuitous conversations of consequence, and not once do you sense they’re signaling the need to walk away (or hang up).
Let’s not lose this—or worse, give away shared meaning to someone, something, anything, that does not truly love or care for us. A true friend or family member in your presence cannot be counterfeited or deep faked.
We do not need a strong man. Locking arms will do.
Remember how you win at Jenga? The tower’s stability depends on its center of gravity. Trust is gravity: it pulls meaning back toward shared reality.
I hope we see each other there.
Ecclesiastes 4:9–12
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor:
If either of them falls down, one can help the other up.
But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.