GUEST-POST: Lead WIth Kindness

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Helping Christian Leaders Achieve Meaningful Results
GUEST-POST: A Kinder Model Of Leadership
June 2022 ~ Summer is a time when our personal and professional rhythms change. We take vacations, spend more time outdoors, and hang out with friends and family. 

The same is true for me. We travel and sleep later. (My wife is a teacher, so no 5:15 am alarms for the next several weeks!) In the spirit of summer changes, I'd like to offer my thoughts on a kinder model of leadership, a different center for ministry, and an announcement about my new book on leading change.


Lead with Kindness

Our society has become increasingly unkind, and I'm not just talking about gun violence and mass shootings. I believe these are just the tip of a much bigger iceberg of anger and disrespect and hatred. Beneath the surface, that iceberg is made up of millions of small interactions that have the potential to make the world better or worse. 

A brief conversation at the grocery store made me more aware of this reality. During the pandemic, my wife and I discovered the safety of curbside delivery, and we're still enjoying the convenience that it offers. One particular day, the store employee told me that she was trying to arrange the bags so they wouldn’t tip over during my trip home. I simply said, "Thanks. I'm sure you're doing your best." She replied, "I wish everyone believed that." She then told me about irate customers who would lash out if she didn't load their cars perfectly. I thanked her again, and drove away feeling sorry for this hard-working, underpaid, and certainly under-appreciated human being. 

I could stop here, and the moral would be to obey the golden rule and "do unto others…" But I think there's a more important leadership lesson. Leaders are culture-shapers. Your leadership style will shape the culture within your church or ministry and beyond. So do you lead with kindness? It is, after all, one of the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5. 

What would leading with kindness look like? It should be seen in the words and tone of voice used to interact with staff, church members, and people in the community. In public speaking (preaching and other), it should be evident in your descriptions of people who are not in room. Are you preparing your church to go into battle or to win with love?

It is interesting that kindness is an essential characteristic of a Christ-follower, but we don't typically include it on the lists of essential leadership attributes. In fact, our stereotypes are that "kind" leaders are doormats who lack drive, are easily run over, and have no vision. The danger of this stereotype is that it can become prescriptive, encouraging leaders to not be "weak." I still believe that leaders need to push themselves and their organizations to be their best. But today, I'd take a little less drive in exchange for an abundance of kindness.


From My Blog: Centering on the Margins

Is your church or ministry centering on the center or on the margins? Let me explain. A recent article described that efforts to increase covid vaccination rates are now “centering on the margins.” The rationale is that general “public service announcements” and other mass communication have reached the people in the center. To increase acceptance, additional efforts will need to focus on zip codes and groups that are skeptical. This is a different strategy that calls for targeted and tailored efforts, such as conducting micro-campaigns in those areas and amplifying the voices of influencers who are respected by specific groups.

Many of the plans developed by churches to “reach the community” are centered on the center, not the margins. Finish this blog ...


How Can I Serve You?

My goal is to serve churches and ministries, and their leaders, helping them turn vision into meaningful results. I do this through:

  • Consulting, including vision implementation and organizational design.
  • Coaching for individual leaders and for executive teams.
  • Staff development through a variety of workshops.

Featured This Month: Leadership Coaching

Coaching is a one-on-one relationship that enables a pastor or ministry leader to develop in specific areas and address complex issues. In this season of confusing challenges, a coaching relationship can be more valuable than ever. Click here to learn more. 

For more information about any of my services, email me to schedule an introductory conversation. 

Coming July 26!
The Art of Leading Change:

Ten Perspectives on the Messiness of Ministry

I am excited to announce the upcoming release of my newest book. The Art of Leading Change focuses on the unpredictable dynamics of moving people toward a new destination. It will help you harness those who are excited, sway the reluctant, engage the apathetic, and deal with resistance – all within the messiness of today’s ministry settings. Click here to learn more. 

Pre-order from Amazon

Also by Mike Bonem:
In Pursuit of Great AND Godly Leadership
Leading from the Second Chair
Thriving in the Second Chair
Leading Congregational Change

Copyright © 2022 Mike Bonem Consulting, LLC, All rights reserved.
Thanks for your interest in being a great and godly leader.

Our mailing address is:
Mike Bonem Consulting, LLC
P.O. Box 2272
Bellaire, TX 77402


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