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Those who you might consider mature Christians may actually be a hindrance to the mission of the church. Like the person who has been at the same church for decades and is gatekeeping its traditions. Or that group of friends who have been in a “closed” bible study for years. There is nothing bad about traditions or friends studying the bible together. However, the love of the comfortable and familiar leads to resistance to change that can actually arrest the spiritual development individuals and the church culture.
I’ve seen so many examples of this that I wasn’t surprised when someone recently asked me, “How can I help ‘mature’ Christians think differently?” It’s an important—and challenging—question. Ideally, if someone has been a Christian for a long period of time, they would have continued growing, thinking, reflecting, and changing—but that is so often not what happens.
Early Spiritual Development
Much of our church culture teaches people to make certain changes in their behavior right after becoming a Christian (for example, stop swearing, stop drinking, etc.) These rules vary from church to church. But once a new Christian has stopped the offending behaviors and conformed to the cultural norms of the church, they’re considered “done.” And being done is a good place to be. After all, if you’ve pretty much gotten your life together, why continue making changes? Or if you know the accepted theology, why question it? Early GPS would announce “You have arrived.” Isn’t that what we all want to hear? You’ve made it, you can relax now.
Arrested Spiritual Development
Allowing an attitude of stasis results in a kind of complacency and inertia that is unhealthy in the extreme. We can end up with churches full of self-righteous, self-satisfied people who think they know all the answers and have it all together. If you ask some of these people what it means to be a follower of Jesus, they might begin by listing some basic beliefs that need to be held, some bad behaviors that need to be avoided, closely followed by church attendance.
Actually, Jesus never said anything at all about church attendance (or temple attendance). That was not part of his teachings, not even a minor one. If you look at all the things Jesus commanded, you’ll come out with a very different list than “go to religious services, do what is expected of you, and avoid doing bad things.” However, there was a group that did teach this: The Pharisees.
The Pharisees were the most difficult group Jesus had to deal with. In fact, even Jesus wasn’t very successful at bringing them around, in spite of spending a good deal of time trying to do so. People who already think they know everything are the most difficult ones to reach. They are the rocky soil. Jesus had a bigger impact with criminals, prostitutes, and ethnic minorities.
4 Pathways to Reviving Spiritual Development
Our spiritual development is meant to continue throughout our lives. If you are coming up against roadblocks to the mission put up by “mature” Christians it will not help to argue with them. Of those longtime Christians, concentrate on those who are the most receptive to continued growth. Talk with them to see how you can help them take steps outside their comfort zone.
Most often, the important first step is trying to do something different and then reflect on that experience. Consider a baby step of application so they could try doing something. Here are a few approaches you can take:
1. Create healthy disequilibrium
This dynamic of putting someone into a new environment explains the power of camp or a short-term missions trip: it takes people out of their everyday perspective so they can experience something different. It creates disequilibrium… in a good way. Jesus created this kind of disequilibrium with the Pharisees by teaching, “You have heard it said X. But I tell you Y.” They also saw him doing things in different ways than they were used to, and had conversations with him about it.
2. Model transformation
Model the change you want them to make in a way that’s visible to them. Sometimes that can even be done through preaching: If you’re the pastor, what stories are you telling? The stories are what captures the imaginations of the people; they help make a principle come to life in a more concrete way. Tell stories about the outward focus you’re implementing in your own life. If you don’t have any stories from your own life, that’s cause for reflection—and likely a big part of the problem in the first place.
3. Affirm steps in the right direction
If you want to see something repeated, affirm it. Even anything approximating what you want to see, affirm it. People are looking for cues: What you recognize communicates what’s important around here. For instance, if someone goes out of her way to help a newcomer, point it out: “I noticed X behavior.” Describe the behavior, then link it to a value: “That’s really important because we want new people to feel comfortable and included here.” And affirm it.
4. Curate safe environments
Create physical and emotional environments that help people process their new experiences. Anything around tables or on couches is usually a good start. Provide reflection questions for discussion and ways for them to intentionally reflect on their experiences. Most importantly, train your discussion facilitators in active listening techniques and include time for practice.
Slowly but surely, these are some ways to help people think—and more importantly, act—differently.
Resources
Guide for Discipling– It’s likely that the Bible studies your longtime Christians are comfortable with are those that have fill-in-the-blank answers. Those are great for head knowledge but are not as powerful for personal transformation. The Guide for Discipling is based in scripture but the questions are more open-ended and focused on personal application. This is a great way to help mature Christians connect timeless biblical truths to their current context. Available with a license to download HERE or on AMAZON.
Finding the Flow– This book, found on AMAZON, overflows with fresh water so that you can be refreshed, encouraged and equipped to help others in small groups drink deeply of the riches of life in Christ as you encounter him together. Also check out a downloadable turn-key small group training kit HERE.
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